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Early November ~ 2O14

October 31, 2014

...Happy Halloween...

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I think I'll post this every October...because

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because it's gloriously sexy,

yet there's always a reminder running in our backgrounds...

get those breasts examined.

Because.

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Exhausted and Irritable

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This is turning into more of a journal...or a "Dear Diary"...and for now, maybe that's what it should be.  

I took the pain med 2 hours ago (12:30 a.m.) and I'm not able to get comfortable.  And although I was told the hand splint would help relieve the pain as it would keep me from bending my wrist or moving my thumb - it doesn't seem to matter and frankly, I guess I'm like Zoe: get this thing off!

Yep, it's all black and all Velcro - so any movement attracts dust particles and pet hairs.  It's lovely.  I can type with it, but with difficulty - so I rip it off for a break and easy typing.  The finger movement doesn't seem to make the pain any worse - it just never goes away.

Well - just like watching TV, counting sheep, reading, rubbing doggie bellies - I'm bored.  Think I'll go find some blogs, Tumblr that entertain for a bit...and a little solitare never hurt!

See ya, 2:34 a.m.

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Investigative Eve

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It feels like a month that I was in the emergency room and heard the news.

Much conversation has transpired since then, but nothing concrete other than I have an appointment with a hand surgeon that will schedule investigative tests and an MRI and from there, the conference as to treatment.

Tonight, I'm not even going to guess what that treatment will be.

All I know is nothing has been the same since August 28th.  I suspect things will change but what that change/those changes will be is what keeps one awake at night.

I'm not going to blame the mid 60's.  My husband died at 62.  A dear friend died at 54.  I don't think age has much to do with illnesses and disabilities.  Sure, we're not as nimble or quick.  Yet I've never needed help to clean my house or sweep the porch...until I hit 65.   We'll see what heading to 66 brings...

For now...I dream of a beach - it's where my heart finds peace...

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three day weekend

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It isn't that I wasn't taught as a child to "count my blessings".  I was.

And later in life, I learned the power of "gratefulness" - and how fulfilling it is.

But today - a long weekend - after this past week's news and the confirmation of a second doctor, I realize I have always been thankful.  For so so so many things in my life.  And I'm thankful for today. For the loving people and critters that surround me and the love that supports me every single day.

Today I am thankful.  And I will be again tomorrow.

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THE word

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L y m p h o m a.


I heard the word.  It was said by an emergency room doctor this morning.  She was reporting the results of a hand & wrist xray.

L y m p h o m a.

The friend that took me to the hospital sat and listened to the rest of the doctor's verbal report.  I'm glad she was with me as I hadn't heard a thing after

L y m p h o m a.

Next Tuesday.  An  appointment with hand surgeon, then a scheduled MRI and afterwards, oncology.


L y m p h o m a.

Don't let anyone tell you words aren't paralyzing.  They are.

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It's the last week of August, 2014...

I can't imagine a finer image of late summer...

I'm a photo whore, so I'm sure I could find something comparable...but not finer.

yeah...I think so too...

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Bill Callahan Finds A Garden Escape From The Loud City

when words connect with your soul

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it's still me...

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Here's what I really think.

We'll never be younger than we are today.

Profound, aye?  You may quote me.

It's ok that I've lobbed-on some poundage

as I've aged...some I can lose.

It's ok that I have wrinkles where I never expected:

did you know earlobes can wrinkle?

It's ok that I can't read as long as I used to, 

or drink as much as I once drank,

or did marathon dances in school that I

wouldn't care to indulge any longer.  

Some - but not all.

What I am sure of is that whomever we were back when - 

is exactly who we are today.  We are our perfect selves.

Yep, I may help my 'red' hair and I may be a tad rounder,

but I'm still the girl I was at 5, 25, 45 and now...

I'm good with that.

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Two more days and nights...

then it's off to the hospital for back surgery.

Back surgery.  I've heard those words before,

but I never related to them.  It sounded awful.

Now I know - awful is living in 24/7 pain and there are

people that will live in pain for the rest of their lives...

I'm sorry for them.  

Hopefully, when all goes well, I'll have some surgery pain

from which to heal - and then other than the pain from aging

joints, all will be well again.  

Getting out of bed for now is the worst.  That and dropping

something on the floor that you KNOW will hurt really bad

to pick up - but it can't stay down there.

Owwwww.

Gimme back the 'ol me.

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St. Patrick's Day...

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(yes, this is me at 23)*

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*ahhhhh, hahahahahahaha

Nairobi Blue

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Nairobi Blue.

That is the colour Lupita Nyong'o called the dress

she wore to the Oscars this year.  

I told her it was my favorite and that it is rarely duplicated.

Then I started looking for it and it was easy to find somewhere 

between the sky and the ocean. It's all over nature.

Man even tries to copy it to textiles...

...taken, once again, from nature ~ 

of course.

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wakie wakie

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WAKE UP!

Sometimes ideas and messages take time to brew for me.

And...sometimes they come crashing in like a wave hitting shore on purpose
to get the attention of the beach!

Today was the Art message.

Get up.

Go looking.

Your eyes need to filled up with pinks and greens and yellows and blues.

ahhh....my eyeballs are starting to feel better, 

to say nothing of my heart...

Q: more art? more colour?

A.  always!

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Feb 26th....sigh...

Just as soon as possible...

ground without snow.

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